Let's Get Real

I'm a pretender. I have tried to pretend things are alright when they are not. And I'm at the point where I've been confronted about the life that I dream of and the life I lead now. They are not the same. Because of this I've tried to settle into a routine, the mundane to dull out the ache within. But it doesn't do anything but have me sitting here like this. I'm tired of beating myself up and out of situations and circumstances. Not this time. I'm searching for You and You've been here the entire time, waiting for me to see. I've been willingly blind and unconsciously blind to some things. It's time for me to reposition myself. Period. Nothing more but this time as I've said before but finally mean now, I'm not doing this alone. This may sound like rambling and random but I think I just need to put this out here and just let it be. Compassion, grace and hard work. Those are the things that will help in this and I'm not looking back at the past. The old way hasn't worked so I'm done going there. I'm going to move forward.